Living through trauma: Asil's story
15-year-old Asil grew up in a small town in Syria with his father and younger siblings. The family lived in the centre of the city, and Asil helped his father in his shop after school. One day, however, the family’s quiet life was shattered by the conflict that has been taking place in Syria since March 2011. As bombs began to fly, Asil and his family made the first of what would become many moves in search of a safe place to shelter.
Asil remembers his old life, “In a normal day I used to go to school. I’d go and play with my friends for a while before I came home and went to bed. I used to play football.”
“My favourite memories in Syria are playing with my friends. If I could go back I’d want to rebuild my town.”
By the time Asil was 14 he had already been moving from safe place to safe place within Syria for months. Every time they moved to a new place, the bombing seemed to follow.
His family resorted to sheltering in an underground hideout. They stayed hidden for most of the day, only peeping above for 10 minutes each morning to stretch their legs and breathe some fresh air.
“Every time we were bombed we were very afraid. Five of my neighbours had died, two of them were my friends.”
Finally, Asil and his family left the area and went to live with his uncles, where they thought they were safer.
I told my younger brothers and sisters ‘Don’t be afraid.’ Everything is going to be fine.
At first the uncle’s home seemed like a peaceful respite from the violence that had been doggedly following their family. However, soon fighting arrived in that once-peaceful town.
“We took refuge in a basement. We’d been there for about 15 days when we left the basement. One early morning we heard that a sniper shot my uncle dead. Then a rocket hit the house. We wanted to move, to run, but we didn’t respond – we didn’t know what to do. It was then that another missile hit.
When it hit, one of the walls fell on me. Nobody heard me screaming – I kept screaming and screaming but nobody could hear. I saw that my hand had been ripped off, so I tore some of my t-shirt off to stop the bleeding.
I thought at first that I had died, but when the dust settled I realised that I was alive. I couldn’t hear anything at first. My father and uncle were looking for me but I couldn’t hear them yelling. They walked past me and I saw their legs – I grabbed my uncle’s ankle and they finally found me. He said, ‘Who is this? Who is this?’ and I cried ‘It’s me!’ My dad said, ‘Thank God you’re alive.’
Surprisingly I wasn’t in any pain. It was painless. The only time I felt the pain was when I wanted to stand up and move and I couldn’t. It wasn’t until I arrived at the hospital that I blacked out.”
When Asil woke up again, he was in a hospital in Lebanon.
I was happy that I was alive. I thank God that it happened to me and not my brothers or sisters.
However, after several months of treatment, Asil just feels trapped. In addition to adapting to life without his hand, he’s awaiting surgery. He longs to return to Syria despite the danger, but he cannot leave the hospital because of his treatment.
“I want to go back to Syria. Even if the war hasn’t stopped, as soon as I finish my treatment I want to go back to my hometown. I want to go alone. I don’t want my family to go with me, I’m worried they won’t be able to run as fast as I can.”
This March the Syrian crisis moves into its fifth year. Over 1.5 million children have now been affected by the conflict. They’ve fled their homes, many have lost friends or family members, and some, like Asil, have suffered physical injuries. However, even children who have remained physically unharmed are still suffering from the disruption and trauma experienced during four years of war.
World Vision’s Syria Crisis Appeal is helping families affected by the crisis in Jordan, Syria, Iraq, and Lebanon in a wide range of projects, including water and sanitation, nutrition and livelihoods, and child friendly spaces where children can receive psycho-social care and remedial education. All the fundraising in the world would not be able to give Asil back his hand. However, with everyone’s help we can make sure that children like him continue to receive the help they need, and keep the dream of a brighter, more peaceful future alive.
*Asil’s name has been changed to protect his identity and keep him safe.